Out Of Cape Cod Tonigh

You know the script by now! Totally skint bla blabla. All the same, good week! And things are on the up – what goes up…

Monday – First things first, extended my overdraft so I can actually live. I was expecting to be gruelled by awkward questions. Can I extend my overdraft? ‘Yeah how much do you want?’.Piece of piss. Went for a shop and bought some food. Spent the day looking for a job etcetc.

Tuesday – Had an interview in the morning.went pretty well. Got totally lost on the way there tho, ended up sprinting about trinity for 15 mins. Watched last king of Scotland at night – that’s a crackin film. Just shows how much better the scots are than English bastards. Everyone knows it!! Haha. John came over and showed us the tune he was recording.

Wednesday – Up nice and early, John picked me up. Steel also jumped in fairly hammered from previous encounter. He told us about mikes absolutely comedic and embarrassingly amazing performance at the college gig the night before. Took about an hour to get to the college, because John had to pick up a hat and gloves from various places. Ripped into steel about how he’s shite at bass cos he has to use 3 fingers to play the triplets in raining blood..what a pussy! He got so worked up it was so funny. Into the studio, met Johnny Warner, good lad – not seen him in an age. They have some kick ass fucking gear in that studio, fuck. I put down a guide bass part for john to drum with.. but it was soon discovered my bass part was far superior mwuhaha. So it fucking should be aswell!! Only been playing for 5 years hah. It felt good to groove again, not been in a situation like that for a while – and its good to see I can still come out with a killer groove within 5 mins of hearing the tune. Grabbed some lunch with mike and steel, back into the studio for round two. I just observed. The tune was sounding pretty good, we ran out of time – but would’ve been good to chuck loadsof overdubs on it! John gave us a lift home – went up to mikes for a bit, then headed to mine to play some fifa – I kicked mikes ass(in one game)(compared to his 10). Watched everton Liverpool. Fairly dull game. Headed to Liquid room(faith) John got us in for free good lad. I only took £10 with me, so didn’t get that pished really. Good night tho – All they crazy folk from T were out! These two Chinese girls followed me about, like wherever I was dancing they were right behind me. But whenever I tried to talk to them they completely blanked me. I tried moving but they still followed me..i was like what the fuck is going on! Speak to me or leave me alone! Danced till about 230. Went outside and helped john bounce folk about. Mike went and took up a sniper position on the bridge. A French girl was like ‘Escuse, are eh a franz ferdinand u French band?’ I’m like na, their fucking Scottish you tool. Some guy was passed out in a sitting down position, I was gonna go and scream at him, but a random rapist made off with him. John gave us a lift home which was kind. Got home and raced craig at Mario kart – he beat me, which is why I shouldn’t compete against people when I’m drunk – I’m a useless drunk!

Thursday – Got up, and made possibly the worst decision ever. I went for a run, when I was hungover! My god. Got back, went to the dentist. Mis timed my departure, so I had to sprint. Met a twin. Made it to the dentist just in time. Metronomic drilling while listening to Lily Allen is not my idea of a good time. It was horrific. Cost me fucking £80 too. Although I guess its worth it if my teeth are gonna be fine from now on though. Spent the rest of the day in agony. Tried to sleep while watching midsummer murders. Although my eyes were shut, and I was in some weird state of mind where I could hear what they were saying, and I was imagining – quite vividly – what they were doing etc. Fucking shit like. Got up about 1745 and ran to work. Fairly pish shift. My mouth was so sore, and I was so tired. Met a friend of Kieran’s. Me and fraser were given the task of clearing the cromdale. Got in about 145. I had the aim of finishing by 3. Hammered it completely – had leiths helping us which was grand. They pissed off about 230, leaving us for the final hurdle. Although fraser had pissed off somewhere so I was left to work the lift myself. Finished just after 3. Neil then made us take 20 more tables out! Aaaah. Did it then got a taxi. Crazy taxi driver. He was like(in a Spanish/latino/American accent) ‘hey man, don’t laugh – but where the fuck is polwarth gardens?’ so I told him, but he wouldn’t listen. Then he stopped at a green light for like 2 mins before I told him to go. I was considering that he’d maybe had a couple dubes before jumping in the taxi. Hahahaha. Went to bed. TV at 330am is fucking shite btw – don’t watch it.

Friday – struggled out of bed about 2. went over to andys for a(very quick) practise. Quite funny – his room faces the point hotel – We could just see naked men standing at their windows. Haha. Headed along to Cab Vol for a sound check. Caught the end of the vivians soundcheck. Now – I don’t agree with their style, they look like a bunch of pillocks – and they are definitely not punk. They give punk a bad name, which isn’t saying much since a vast majority of punk music at the moment is derivative shite. However, they had some killer tunes. Went up to clamshell and used my tips from the night before to purchase a donner wrap. Tasty. Went to the tron, and met the guys from Smoked glass, as well as the college crew etc – went down and joined them. Decided that the only way my(friendly) rivalry with Johnny steel can be settled is if we have a duel on the slopes of mount doom(or Arthur seat) - with mike on north bridge with his sniper rifle covered in piss having been lying there for 2 days. He didn’t know which one to shoot cos we were moving so fast. Also, if you ever see a red dot on your body(from a sniper rifle- although come to think about it, do sniper rifles even have red dots?probably) put your hand on it, and the dot wont be on your body – thus letting you escape with only one of your hands being blown off, rather than your body. Haha ok. Headed down to cab vol. Drank some free beer, did some warm ups – played a killer set. Paparazzi were down the front – strike a pose. The boys from roughmute – who I’ve not seen since the days of billy liar were there. Came up to me and at first I didn’t recognise them. I knew their band began with an R and they were from Falkirk, I just couldn’t remember the name! Good lads, I miss them.
Left my bass in the kitchen, and went to the tron. This bird was fairly pished, and generally said nothing other than ‘I love this song’ ‘are you coming to my gig’ and ‘I love this song’. Haha. Good lassie. Ritchie downed a lady boy(Pint of guiness, GandT, and a Baileys) in 20.5 seconds. It was fairly impressive, considering what they do when they get mixed.
Headed up to the hive. Mike kept accidentally buying me drinks, oh no. haha. I got him a couple back though. Twins were there. It was amazing. And Swinton, and Alec and Sophie – EVERYONE. Boom, I miss it. Those fucking Chinese girls were there again! Aaahhaha. These American girls were chatting to us – it was their birthday. They promptly left when we told them hashy was our drug dealer. Except one, who was like ‘What do you sell?’ haha. U!S!A! Mike tried to fight someone, cos he was keeper of the peace. You rageaholic haha. Addicted to Rageahol. Fay was there – didn’t know she was back from Oz so was a shock. Spent most of the night catching up with her. Again I was skint, so I didn’t drink thaaaat much. Asked mick if I could borrow 50p, he didn’t have it so I started the minesweep. Kristen was totally goosed, I tapped her on the head and was like ‘Mini Para’, she goes ‘ughghggfuagugfj’ hahah. Helped Fay find her friends, then I had a power walk home, took me like 10mins. Decided I wanted to fall asleep listening to my ipod. 40mins later I realised this wasn’t working, so switched it off.

Saturday – Vegetated/Looked for a job. Went to pick up my bass from Cab V, took an age walking home, stopping off at various points of call.

Sunday – Watched some football. Absolutely humped craig at Mario kart in my sober state. Went up to my folks and had some lasagne.

Next week – Operation Execute Jemima enters Phase 2. Quite fancy going to see broken records on thu. Epicly trying to secure a Job. Not sure what plans for the weekend are, but I’m sure I shall have some. Orevoir.